Left dead beloved spouse or divorce is not an easy thing for everyone. Especially for a man, a single parent would not be easy, so many men who decide quickly find a replacement partner.
Fathers in parenting instincts certainly do not like a woman. However, for the sake of the baby, the father should be able to perform that role when it became a single dad.
As a single parent, the role of fathers in the family, of course, become more widespread. Besides prosecuted breadwinner role, the father must also take care of various household purposes. Most importantly, ensure the growth of children going well.
For a single father (single dad) who recently had this new role, certainly not easy to do. However, according to two psychologists Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend in their book entitled ‘Raising The Great Children‘ all real fathers instinctively gifted with the ability to care for her child.
Of course, as well as on a mother, father also takes time to learn to care for her baby.Moreover, the traditional role of the formerly exclusive to the territory of a mother, now no longer strange performed by fathers. The father is no longer hesitate to accompany their children play, learn, eat together, even preparing food for her children.
As mentioned in the book “Fathers, Infants and Toddlers’ work and Dwight MY Yogmen Kindlon, at this moment a father figure is also capable of being warm to their children, unlike the conventional image of a rigid father and forward the matter of discipline and order for their children . Image as a cool and well-respected figure, and shunned her children is not an appropriate image for today’s dad.
Therefore, the role of single fathers in the lives of children even more into an ideal role model. For boys, the father became an example of how to behave and act every day as a man.
Whereas for girls, the father must be a protector and guidance as the figure. This allows the girls will not awkward when the time grew up to face the opposite sex in social interaction. As for giving advice about things feminine as they enter adolescence, such as having periods for the first time, help from relatives of women is certainly needed.
Here are tips to be a single dad
1. Make a Child Feel Safe
As a single father, one of the biggest responsibilities is to ensure children have felt safe. Make sure the child feels that the father concerned about his future life and future. Make them understand that the father would always accompany them when facing problems. It is very important to be done so that children do not feel lonely and fear in living his life.
Ensure that single fathers are ready to provide 24 hours a day for the sake of the children, regardless of its form. Whether he is having trouble facing exams or a fight with his friend, nor when he was ill, always take the time to be with her. Make your child feel his father is a priority in life.
However, do not ever try to cover up the fact that family life is not the same single parent families who are still full of their parents. Give a correct understanding of what differences there are and how to overcome them. Explain also that although there are differences, but the affection given by the father as a single parent is not less when compared to mother’s father in another family.
2. Do Work Together
The best way to build a harmonious relationship between father and child is by taking the time to do an activity together. Kebersaamaan This will bring emotional closeness between father and the baby.
Togetherness can be realized in the form of childcare, interactions at close range when at home and concern shown when in office. Dad should be aware that children, both male and female, are entitled to attention as much as they are also in the care of a mother.
In addition, there is no harm if the father a little talk about the things that fathers do every day like the job done, the people who worked with his father and so on to the child. By hearing the story, the baby’s father will get to know yourself.
3. Single fathers and Career
Men are usually raised with the understanding that they will become breadwinners when they mature. Therefore, the work is one important part of self-confidence of a man.
For a single dad, a dual responsibility in taking care of family and a career should not be considered a burden. However, these dual roles should be a trigger for more success in a career that more and more children need to be fulfilled.
For the sake of the baby single dad had to change some things in his life:
4. Eliminate Bad Habits, Habits
As a single dad, by itself all you do will be an example of behavior that will be taken by children. Therefore, you must eliminate the bad habits you have, such as smoking, drinking alcohol or say harsh words to not be a bad example of behavior for children.
5. Do not Critique of Past Relationships
If you are a single parent because of divorce, never to speak ill of the mother of the child in front of him. This will cause the emergence of the child’s negative understanding of the relationship between men and women. If this happens, of course very bad influence on children’s mental when he grew up.
6. Understand Your Child Needs
Your child’s needs will change with age. Try to understand what changes occur and how the proper guidance you have provided. Always show that you have the attention to the problems he had, even though the issue is not complicated. Your attention will give confidence to it.
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